I’ve become that guy!


Last night, at a social function, I turned into that guy. I used to joke about being a “Hyphenate”, that is, a writer-producer-director-a**hole! Last night, I crossed the ‘rude-icon.’

Pontificating is best left to pontiffs, bloviating to the bloviators and pedantics to the, um, well,… the pedanta-philes, I guess. But there is no way in H-E-double hockey sticks, that I should have simultaneously, berated and regaled my dear friends with my extremely tedious treatise on the vicissitudes of the authoring process. Like a bowler leaning his body to karmically get the ball to curve into the 7-10 split, I bent the vernacular, twisted the point and generally put “the spin” on my English.

God! Look at what I just wrote, above!

Who am I? Who is this person I’ve become? I have a case of mothball smelling, patches on the sleeve, utteration-laden, over dramatic profundities capable, boring, old Professor’s Syndrome.

Yuck! Me? I used to be soooo cool. Now, I am a walking, comedic character from a ‘coming of age’ college kid movie spewing dialog lines like; “Er… not really!” an ambushing, “However, in reality…” a ticking, “Well, here’s an interesting fact.”. I hope I get over myself in time for my next blog.

Wait, ‘utteration’ isn’t even a word! See what I mean!